Teenagers Who Tell Lies, What To Do?
How to deal with teenage children who tell lies? Communication between parents and children is always the subject of study and reflection, especially with regard to lies and subterfuges, in this phase of transition between childhood and adulthood.
In this article, we will cover this topic so that you know how to deal with teenage children who tell lies. This tendency usually conceals deeper causes, such as behavioral problems, emotional changes, or difficulties in communicating in the family.
Teenage children who tell lies
When parents realize that their teens are lying, there comes an inflection point. Parents sometimes avoid talking to their children for fear of the lie, as if they closed their eyes to the problem. At the same time, children perceive a lack of trust and even avoid talking to their parents.
A gradual estrangement takes place and parental supervision is also affected. If a solution is not found, in the long run this behavior could lead to difficulties in relating to others, aggressive behavior, loss of self-control, etc.
For this reason, the first step is to find out if your teen is lying on time. If this happens, it’s time to enlist the help of a professional to solve the problem and restore a healthy parent-child relationship.
How to find out if children are lying?
Some alarm bells
Let’s start by saying that if you are reading this article it is because you already suspect that your teenage children are lying to you. If so, you have probably already spotted some of the following signs:
- They exaggerate in recounting lived events.
- They often resort to “white lies”.
- They don’t tell you what happens to them at school, for example about teachers or exam results.
- Learn about facts in which they are involved through third parties.
- They post photographs (for example on social networks) that show only the particularly positive side of reality or that they live every day.
- Not sure what they do when they go out with friends.
- They only tell you part of the story when you ask questions.
Body language
While talking to your children, you should pay attention to some unambiguous cues by observing their body language. These signs will help you understand if what he is saying is true or not; moreover, the younger your children are, the clearer these signals will be.
For example, teens who tell lies will avoid looking us in the eye. In addition, they may be looking to the right, which indicates an eye movement associated with the imagination and, therefore, a possible lie. All this could be accompanied by a slight tremor in the voice and hands.
How do they express themselves?
When you ask your children a question, pay attention to how they express themselves. If they are improvising, they will never express themselves as easily as when they tell you something they have actually experienced.
For example, teens who tell lies may repeat the same concept several times or give too much detail about the situation. This is done in order to justify something unreal.
Teenagers who tell lies and emotional distress
Any teenager has lied to their parents at least once. This stage of change is particularly attractive for the child who is now feeling grown up and who wants to try everything. Nonetheless, if lies are recurrent, we must also pay attention to the emotional universe of our children.
A teenager’s lies could be a symptom of emotional distress. For example, low self-esteem, a period of depression or stress, or a strong feeling of loneliness. Lying may want to show a person that he is not, but that he would like to be. Or he may want to protect his parents and avoid making them worry about him by solving everything himself.
As parents, it is essential to spot our children’s lies in time. Only in this way will we be able to prevent negative behavior that could compromise the relationship with the family and trust in it, but also for children and their social relationships.
